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Bangkok, my old friend, back again in your embrace. Paul Theroux is adamant in his description of Bangkok as “a hugely preposterous city of temples and brothels” and though I haven’t been that bold in my explorations, I concur. I am in transit, leaving to the Gomorrah of the East – Macau, city of a thousand one armed bandits!
Chiang Mai. This city is the largest in the north of Thailand and the gateway to treks, waterfalls, national parks and the isolated border areas near Burma and Laos. I took the night train, 2nd class, and compared it with my Vietnamese experience. White, sterile, the harsh fluorescent light remaining on all night which makes a comparison with an operating theatre not too far astray. The air conditioning was nicely tuned to keep frozen meat frozen. Less use for those attempting to sleep shivering in their shorts and t-shirts.
Chiang Mai is laid out with an old moat surrounding an ‘old’ city and the larger city sprawling beyond and around. It is bisected by some major roads and little sois come off these which follow the old water buffalo tracks and it is studded with old wats that rise above the surrounding houses. There is a fairly strict height law in place which restricts buildings near wats which almost excludes all of the city in the wall from buildings more than two stories high.
I really hit the jack pot and rambled into a wonderful guest house called Giant House which while simple, did have the kitchen area opening straight onto the street and a collection of disparate inhabitants from all corners of the world. Many of them were on two week massage courses and I sadly only received one brief back rub on the last day from a friendly Tibetan! They had complimentary bikes so I entertained myself by losing my way in the little lanes, coming across wonderful organic food restaurants and jazz bars.
I probably should mention that at some point during some long term travel, one gets nostalgic for some rest (I know how this sounds…) and a desire to stay in one place for a bit. Chiang Mai is such a place. I visited the local university for a film viewing, was invited to enter a massage course, narrowly missed out on visiting a palmist, stayed up all night talking to a Dutch girl who discovered the keen southern man in Southland and went on a cooking course! Delicious stuff those cooking courses. For one day I cooked eight dishes including pad thai, chicken green curry, tofu masaman curry, spring rolls, T.V.P with basil leaf (my biggest miss) and fried bananas with ice cream! Lots of fun and I certainly enjoyed the flaming wok and lack of washing up.
Train travel. What a wonderful way to travel! I am ranting now for I have been inspired by Paul Theroux’s book where he travels for four months from London to Japan and back on the Trans-Siberian. Of course he completed that 35 years ago so probably not as relevant now but certainly one of the best books I’ve read on my trip so far. The perfect accompaniment and I believes now that reading ‘on scene’ is much more powerful. My own trip back to Bangkok via train was wonderful - overnight but with enough daylight to take in the electricity pylons straddling the land like the bridges of cellos, a green fastness enclosing the train as we sped through jungle over rusty bridges, being fed some poor excuse for a chicken rice dish (the worst meal I’ve had in Thailand so far), woken by my friendly top bunk mate drunk as a skunk after a session in the dining car on Chang and again experiencing the fear that my bag will be stolen while I sleep, the carriage being one long compartment. Why was getting to sleep on thetrain such hard work? You’d think the rhythmic clickity-clack, swaying motion, harsh fluorescent bulbs, the regular tramp of the guards boots and the slam of the door as persons unknown enter and exit the carriage would lull me.
My final day in Bangkok sped by, dropped my bag off at 6am and straight to the Chinese embassy to pick up my passport, burnt all photos to DVD, bought a fake ISIC card, posted two packages full of presents home, uploaded all photos to Flickr as backup, completed my income tax return and posted, sold my read books and bought the Count of Monte Cristo, received a one hour foot and lower leg Thai massage (feet like semi-soft butter!), met a fellow kiwi and finally sat down and started and finished Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? Finished off with a wonderful red curry and masaman curry with A. which really rounded Southeast Asia off. So long!
Benighted* readers, you have no doubt exulted in happiness at hearing this momentous news! Alternatively you couldn’t give a toss. I sit rather in the latter camp, ’tis but a date and who’s counting?
Bangkok. Once again I return to its clutches. It is the main travel hub of south-east Asia after all. And with some surprise I found I rather liked it second time around! Acclimatised both to the culture and heat allowed me to become familiar with the layout of the city, customs and transport network. I visited many sights – Jim Thompson’s House, Wat Pho, the Royal Palace, Sukhumvit, Chinatown, Siam Square and of course the mother of all markets, the Chatuchak weekend market. Rode the Skytrain, the Metro and conquered the use of the bus system, kind of. I stayed close to Khaosarn Rd in a place only advertised via word of mouth and only admitting people effectively vouched for by people who had stayed there before. Impossible to find if you don’t have exact directions (down an alley and down another alley and round another corner at a dead end with a discreet sign announcing its presence. This place was to become my home for five days.
My purpose for mentioning this is not to get you to ask me where it is, but rather to note the shadow world of long-term travellers. This species has effectively become more at home on the road rather than in any specific location and travel according to their resources, which often means cheaply in south-east Asia especially Indonesia and Thailand, and especially India. They travel in order to pursue knowledge such as local custom, languages, healing techniques, massage, music, yoga and meditation. If there were a place in NZ where this species gravitate towards, it is Golden Bay. They travel according to the seasons thereby spending the best months where it is pleasant (the highlands of northern India are now coming into their prime). All in all some wonderful people and so nice not to need a lock on the bedroom door!
Memories. Some abiding memories of my first three months include:
Facing the demons and jumping off the rope swing in Vang Vieng, seeing people eating far too much happy pizza, the Russian guy all f*ckedup from a scooter crash and fixing himself up with cotton swabs and antiseptic cream ‘to save money’, Tristan almost getting clotheslined off his scooter by a ladyboy bar girl holding a whiskey bucket sign, a shark fin breaking the surface of the water just as we were about to get in to go snorkelling, the lights of the squid fishing fleet edging the entire horizon in High Bar, sleeping the night in Bom’s restaurant after losing the key to the room and failing to wake anyone, seeing Job2Do live playing Pink Floyd covers in the jungle at Half Moon festival, realising how far I’d come from my greenhorn days when on returning to Bangkok and seeing through the first three scams I was offered!, Tristan never actually using his fire pois, inquiring of a cute Irish girl as to her skill in building Molotov cocktails, wandering Angkor Wat on my own and finding a deserted temple to relax in, never having had to wake Tristan and task him with ‘getting out now’, struggling with using Lonely Planet vs. freewheeling it, entering our hotel lobby in Phnom Penh and seeing all the staff online surfing p*rn on the lobby computers, swimming in that lagoon high above the waterfall in Luang Prabang, that manic bus ride into Hanoi, meeting a fellow Aucklander in Sihanoukville there for the ladies (he goes every year…), asking the immigration official in Phuket whether he could use his discretion when he was fining us for overstaying whilst holding a cheeky banknote in my hand, watching an Australian disgracing himself in a ping pong show and his mate yelling aussie, aussie, aussie as he showed the room his tackle, being the only ones in our resort on Koh Lanta – creepy, patiently explaining the phrase ‘have a cup of concrete and harden the f*ck up to different nationalities while Tristan exclaims the impossibility of explaining such a complex saying cross-culture and of course travelling with Tristan!
Nomadic vs. sedentary. I just finished Jules Verne’s Round the World in Eighty Days and this fascinating introduction to the book struck me. The writer refers to an intellectual study of travel writing called The Ethics of Travel by Syed Mansuruk Islam. Seeing as its just so damn relevant I shall reproduce some of it here.
Sedentary travellers … are not necessarily inactive but they concentrate so much upon reaching a pre-established destination that they entirely ignore the ground covered. Islam comments that ‘they might travel in the fastest possible vehicle and cover a thousand miles yet they remain where they are, because they are on a rigid line which keeps them grounded in the enclosure of their home’. Conversely, ‘nomadic’ travellers follow a ‘supple’ rather than a ‘rigid’ line, experience movement as a continuous shifting, a vivid and bumpy ride across boundaries and cultures which brings about what Islam calls ‘the openness of the encounter with the other and the process of becoming’.
The sedentary traveller is likely to cling to his prejudices and shun contact with the unfamiliar culture he had entered. Such is the sedentary traveller, a mere location-swapper whose cultural baggage insulates him from external influence: he never troubles to learn a foreign language and insists on dressing in his habitual garb. The nomadic traveller, on the other hand, relishes the nameless spaces** in between cities and especially the delays and detours which give rise to those unforeseen encounters, challenges and negotiations which are indeed the essential raw material of travel literature. The touristic ideal of ‘nothing going wrong’ – a prospect of travel so predictable that homecoming becomes its sole highpoint.
Simple message really and a challenge to all those travelling to make the most of it! What it also means for me, is less reliance on the guidebook and more on intuition, asking questions of locals and plain getting lost more often!
*Applying to those in the cold and darkened isle of New Zealand.
** To be canvassed in a later post. Hat tip to Amy B!
I am aware that I owe you, avid readers, some pictures. Blogging without pictures is like eating a welldone rump steak without a glass of red. I confess with little remorse that I’ve been too lazy to work out how to put them up until now. Here are a selection of my favourites and I will try to get some more up when appropriate. I’ve decided to stay with low res. at the moment but may try and get some larger ones up if that makes more sense. Yay for my new camera! No photos of birthday debauchery however 
Thailand.
Malaysia
Laos
Dear readers, you will no doubt be delighted to know that I am still alive. Over the past few days we’ve been in Ao Nang, Koh Phi Phi and Koh Lanta. We are now ensconced in the party capital of the west coast, Patong Beach on Phuket island.
Low season.To summarise our trip in Thailand, Tristan wanted to call it ‘I went to Thailand and there was nobody there’. It has been somewhat surprising to experience the lack of tourists in many places we went. We are now entering the low season which starts in May and is mostly due to the monsoon rains which are already starting to fall. We were the only people staying at our resort on Koh Lanta which was kind of creepy so we had to eat all our meals at the neighbouring resorts seeing as they had closed their kitchen. The bars and restaurants are of course desperate to retain our custom and the tout attention is at times smothering! One guy reckoned that business was down about 40% on average, pretty severe!
Crime and corruption. It may not surprise you to know that Thailand ranked 80th in the Transparency International Corruption Perception Index (though Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia are all worse). Of the Thai people who spoke to us candidly (but guardedly) they bemoaned the corruption endemic in politics, the police and generally in the civil service. Every island we went to had at least one appalling building built against all common sense planning rules allegedly because someone had paid someone else off. The resort we stayed on in Koh Lanta, the owners husband was shot and killed by two Thai assassins in front of the resort guests over a land dispute! Often we rubes from far off NZ got shafted in some way by having to pay extra charges we were unaware of for whatever reason. C’est la vie, but not a state of being the Thais really aspire to.
Marijuana. Is rife in Thailand. One Thai guy reckoned that over 80% of Thai men smoke, albeit not every day. I have to say that I have smoked more in Thailand than I have smoked during the rest of my life! The most popular band that we heard was Job 2 Do – a Thai Bob Marley. In actual fact we saw the band live in Koh Phangan at the Half Moon party – they were very good, and Tristan can’t get one song out of his head…
The eastern side aka Gulf of Thailand. Koh Tao, Koh Samui and Koh Phangan.The water is so clear here. Scuba diving and snorkelling are the two main activities. My favourite island was Koh Tao partially I think because it isn’t as developed (only first being settled in 1980 or so). Very laid back atmosphere and the scene of the infamous ‘Chang-over’ incident. Samui is far more developed and also the scene of my Koh Samui tattoo (i.e. local slang for scrapes from scooter crashes! Koh Phangan is basically known as the party island where once a month over 10,000 ravers arrive to party at the Full Moon party on the beach (Haad Rin).
The western side aka the Andaman Sea. Ao Nang, Koh Phi Phi, Koh Lanta and Phuket. Phi Phi is my second favourite island. It was severely devastated in the tsunami but is now rebuilt with plenty of signs pointing to high ground. We had to run a gauntlet of gravelly-voiced masseuses asking us ‘beefcakes’ whether we wanted our ‘sexy boy’-selves massaged and also offering to ‘eat me’ and informing she/he would ‘see me in my dreams’. Awesome. Beach and island were truly beautiful and we saw the beach from the movie ‘The Beach’ which was very .. beach-like. As already mentioned, Koh Lanta was a little too quiet for us but it was clear that of all the islands, this place had retained the greatest ‘local’ flavour with a large population of Muslim and sea-gypsys not wanting to go down the route of over-development where greater tourists also equalled higher living costs and breaking down the traditional ways of life of fishing, coconut and palm oil harvesting and other agricultural pursuits. Ao Nang was alright – kayaking and also off to visit some incredible islands snorkelling. Phuket and PatongBeach in particular are overdeveloped and is you’re on vacation for a week you could have a lot of fun. Two Aussie guys we ran into were on a mission, a retired born again Christian and a guy with a full (and apparently it really meant full) pass from his girlfriend. The rest of the night’s details are censored but suffice it to say the newly debauched Aussie got naked far faster than I would have thought what he had consumed, warranted.
All in all, Thailand rocked and we are now on our way to Malaysia! After than Laos.
So. An eventful time so far and also a partial retraction from a previous post. Currently on Koh Phangan and tomorrow I leave to go to Krabi. Also, happy birthday Dad!
Anatomy of a scam.Previously I referred to two genuine Thais who appeared to assist us without profiting personally from the advice they were giving. I consider myself somewhat of a skeptic. This is how it went down. Went for a walk intending to see some Wats. Walked into a well dressed and well spoken man who was very helpful and noted that the temple we wanted to see was closed but we should see two other temples that were very nice (Lucky Buddha and some other one). He seemingly hailed a tuk-tukfrom nowhere and we were on the way in minutes through the steamy streets of Bangkok. Once at a Wat a nicely dressed man who claimed to be a teacher at the local high school told us some of the history of the Wat and engaged us in conversation. He then recommended we go to the ‘official’ Government tailor factory (not true). Our Wat tour over, the driver then asked if we wanted to see a tailor. Feeling sorry for the old man (in his fifties probably 
) we agreed and I almost bought a suit. Then on we went to what we thought was the Tourism Authority of Thailand (in fact a travel agency licensed by the same). We then paid for too much for a 21 day tour of southern Thailand. And the funny thing is we had no idea we had been scammed until we were on the bus trip south! Incrediblely complex and practiced scam with many disparate actors all seemingly not benefiting from the advice they give but in reality all ringing ahead to get the next person in the scam in place. Really quite entrepreneurial!
All gone Pete Tong. Seriously . Now ok!
Landed in Koh Tao and randomly saw Shannon who I had been sitting next to on the bus south from Bangkok. Decided wisely to have drinks with Shannon (an American former UK premier league soccer player) and met up with Matt DB (cheers Lauren and Ballinger!) - for drinks with the local scuba mafia (Koh Tao being the site of probably the cheapest PADI licensing and some superlative diving). Then onto dinner quickly followed by whiskey buckets at a salubrious Ozzie establishment called Choppers… suffice it to say Tristan went blind and just kept saying he ‘just wanted to get home’ and spewed black stuff quietly in the corner. Shannon decided in his vastly inebriated state he could drive and spun out in a puddle with me on the back. My Keen shoes have now saved my feet twice! Luckily the scooter was not too damaged but the key was nicked out of the machine while Shannon went to get his foot dressed at the local pharmacy. Not only that but some local Thai layabouts had wheeled the scooter 15m down the lane to make it look like we had crashed into another scooter. After a brief scuffle to try and retrieve the key, the guy who had them threw them to a friend who ran off up the road. They said they would call the police and duly summoned, a young guy with a fake police badge around his neck tuned up and informed Shannon he would have to pay recompense of 3000 baht (NZ$150). During this time I was looking for Tristan and our scooter….
We finally managed to extricate ourselves from this situation (poorer and perhaps slightly more ropable) and Tristan hailed a ride on the back of a scooter with a Thai guy willing to drop him off for 100 baht. As we drove in font of him, we were unaware that Tristan had in fact been driven down some random driveway and taken into a one room house where he was asked to pay 1000 baht to be able to leave, before being offered the opportunity to buy drugs. In the end the only thing he could do was pay 200 baht for some “marijuana” also known as pot pourri.
After Shannon and I realised he had gone missing, we turned around and wisely deciding to walk, we were overjoyed to find Tristan being dropped off by the rouge ‘taxi’ driver but not after he asked Tristan to pay an extra 300 baht for his bag of pot pourri which we managed to prevent.
The next morning horribly hungover we returned to the scene of the crime and reflected on how it could all have been a lot worse. Shannon had to pay for damages to the scooter in the region of 3000 baht. In talking to the scuba crew they said that it was the first time they had ever heard of such a crazy story happening in Koh Tao. Even directly outside of, of all places, the local 7/11.
So, the learning continues and we are now much the wiser where whiskey (containing the local Thai stuff which is very dangerous when mixed with Red Bull concerntrate), helpful Thai people and scooters.
Getting to grips with a country takes time I understand. The smells, the tastes, the sights, the foreign habits, unfamiliar customs and the currency! I am doing my best. With an inquiring mind I have tried to decipher the Bangkok bus system (impossible), attempted to work out how much I should be paying for items such as bottled water, accommodation and taxis, getting better at bargaining despite getting ripped off just about every time and of course working out the why’s of the Thai national psyche – not an easy thing!
Bangkok: It’s a madhouse of over 8 million people but also an interesting one when you get past all the smells and noise. Khao Sarn Rd is of course the same-same – backpacker central and where we based ourselves. Scams galore (further post to come on this topic) and also police every few dozens metres unobtrusively on the upper floors of the buildings overlooking the road.
Mongoose: We took a day trip south west of Bangkok to the floating markets, kind of naff in the touristy bits but then we went by longtail boat out in the canals where we saw houses of people living by/in/above the river. Certainly an eye-opening experience. Then onto the Cobra Show where we saw guys cheating death by dodging jumping snakes, striking cobras and coiling pythons. Also a one-on-one match between a mongoose and a snake. The mongoose won! Ripped a fang out of the snakes mouth (which it does to then be able to bite it with no risk to itself) before the match was called off, the snake off to the snake hospital or something. Finally saw some cultural show which including some Muay Thai (Thai boxing).
Politics: Thailand is undergoing significant political unrest. If you are interested in it in more detail please research it before making a decision to come or not based on media headlines. Basically there are two movements opposed to one another (the red party representing former Prime Minster Thaksin and made up mostly of rural voters, and the yellow party which represents the Bangkok elite and middle class). We saw buses with bullet-holes and police stations with smashed windows from the protests 2 1/2 weeks ago. When we were in Bangkok every little shop was tuned to the all-day, two day political debate in parliament which was debating the lifting of the emergency laws currently in effect. Now the debate has finished it is possible the Reds will again start to protest. This is all of course means little to us in the touristy places because no-one wants tourists targeted which really would destroy the tourism industry which employs more Thais than any other and would devastate the economy at a time when it is already suffering from lower tourist numbers due to the economic downturn. That said we have already noticed heavy police and military presences with road checks on the way south out of Bangkok and many around Bangkok. There were even some on Koh Samui with younger guys wearing red kerchiefs around their necks to show their political affiliation. Many Thais we spoke to that worked in the tourism sector simply wish it to be resolved.
Koh Samui: At the moment I am on Koh Samui, a large island on the South-east coast of Thailand where the party is supposed to last all year! Took us about 12 hrs by bus with another 2-3 hours to get to the island from the mainland. Suffice it to say I was somewhat surprised to discover than in actual fact, the place is just about empty of tourists. The resorts are supposed to be pretty full because the Thai new year was last week but it seems people have left pretty soon and the only people left are honeymooning couples, older couples and single men from Russia, Israel and Britain (accompanied by nice Thai girls). Sadly no large groups of Swedish lasses…
So that’s it for now. Still alive and still drinking large Chang!
Dear readers,
I have passed an eventful few days in Sydney kindly being hosted by my friend Erik near Darling Harbour and am now in Bangkok sweltering in 35 deg heat.
Goodbyes. Twas a great farewell for me I think – quick like a band aid from Mum, Dad and sis’. I often think that long, drawn out affairs don’t really add anything to the parting. You will no doubt be emailing and phoning the instant you touch down anyway (unless you are a degenerate son like me). If you wait until the hour before you leave to say all the things you meant to say over the preceding week you’re only letting yourself in for waterworks
Sydney.What can I say but had a blast – Erik and the international crew squatting at his swank inner-city executive apartment kick ass! Had some bizarre moments with Tristan and his mate Peter – drunkenly inquiring of some girls from Ireland whether they knew how to make Molotov cocktails not my finest hour to be sure, to be sure, diddly, diddly. Went swimming on Bondi Beach as can by proven by the below photo. Tristan made the most of it by spewing out both rings for a night. Not something to inspire confidence when flying into Bangkok…
Bangkok. Dirty old Bangkok. A great place to work out whether you are ready to get chug down that cup of hard and buckle down as a traveller or are in fact a sheep ready to be shorn by sharp-eyed touts.
Julian and Tristan’s Guide to Bangkok:
Accommodation: Get shafted and pay a little too much in order to feel safe and protected amongst similar backpacking fish. Peter’s suggestion was great however for our midnight arrival – just too tired to care really. Rooftop pool with scantily clad Scandanavians and a comp breakfast. Alternatively sort it out via recommendations from experienced travellers and book ahead.
Locals: Every guide book you read, and associate you speak to, has horror stories of getting ripped off, how everyone who speaks to you is in for a buck and how the best thing about Bangkok is leaving it. Despite appearances to the contrary, in one day we encountered two random Thais (a professional and a teacher) who offered unprompted advice on what to see, warned us of dangers and generally enjoyed practicing their English on us. Closing your mind to the possibility of positive experiences will always reduce the likelihood of those experiences occurring. That said, the one thing I am not enjoying so much is the need to constantly be on your guard to prevent getting taken advantage of. Oh NZ is a sheltered place!
Food. No bad experiences as yet. Had a faux ‘western’ breakfast which was interesting and a chicken and egg Pad Thai from a street vendor for 40 baht ($2). Thai green curry for dinner. Many western options with food but I am attempting to eat only hot Thai food with meat and drinks with ice to maximise my chances of acquiring stomachs cramps and unstoppable waves of diarrhoea. I will keep you informed as to progress.
Stupas. The Thai word for temple. Lots of them. See one and you’ve seen them all according to some. We were even invited to a funeral for a local CEO when entering one today! In any case, see a couple early.
Tailors. Got ferried to one by our local Tuk-tuk driver. He was a delightful fellow who informed us he got a fuel voucher for 5 litres of petrol to deliver us to one. Once inside I did my best to appear informed as to cut of cloth, the drape, pleats, cuffs, cashmere, 180s fine, thread and most importantly the cost. In the end (three complimentary beers down) I demurred and said I wanted to compare prices. His offer: 1 suit, 2 trousers, 3 shirts for 15,000 baht. In any case, now doing internet research and I may be better off getting something made in Shanghai.
More adventures will be forthcoming – only been here for one day and I’m already feeling the vibe! 6am start tomorrow…
