Our bold hero elected to cycle through the Vondelpark. An ecclesiastical calm pervades accented by the regular will-o’-the-wisp street lamps doing their damnedest to be both energy-efficient and security conscious.

Like a moth drawn to the flame, Icarus pedaled up P.C. Hooftstraat. Pieter of course being a poet, playwright and historian whose name lends cachet to Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Hermes, Ralph Lauren and several dozen other status-symbol dispensaries as well as playing host to a chain of champagne-coloured Christmas chandeliers which march down the street.

Suddenly there is an insistent tug on one foot. A wise head unclouded by too much red wine elects to stop pedaling immediately. Coasting to a halt, our hero pulls on one leg only to have his worst fears confirmed. The Kermit-green shoelace of one shoe are neatly coiled around the pedal. Over-balancing, a slow motion (in bullet-time) collapse occurs and Icarus finds himself on his ass on the wet ground, shackled to his bike. Worse, a concerned matron cycling home from her lover at 1am stops to offer assistance which is just as pleasantly turned down as the hero considers his less-than-heroic predicament.

As the rain patters gently, the hero picks at the lace and manages to uncoil himself from this treacherous contraption. Minor knee grazing aside, only pride is affected. However Icarus could have died had this and that and this happened.

Bringing this public safety announcement to all long-laced shoe-wearers everywhere! Double-knot or end up in a plot.

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